Tricks
I try to teach my dog
Tape South Park for me
Take a bath
Fetch me a soda/beer
Don't bark and wake the neighbors
Start dinner
Don't fart
Wash the car
Make the bed
Don't pull on the leash
(Don't walk so fast)
Do the laundry
Don't beg for food
Pick up your toys
Clean the house
Do your business in the toilet,
so I don't have to clean up after you |
 |
Tricks
my dog tries to teach me
Turn the television off
(or at least turn it down)
Take a bath
(My nose is more sensitive than yours!)
Fetch me a milkbone
(and a Perrier.)
Don't yell at me when I chase away the
neighbor's cat from peeing on your flowers
Where's dinner?
(I'd do it myself if you would let me.)
Don't fart!
(That's disgusting! & remember the nose thing?)
Wash the car!
(It's embarassing to be seen in your dirty car)
Get me a bed
(The floor is cold!)
Don't pull on the leash
(Don't walk so slow!)
Wash my pillow/blanket
(It's starting to smell like you!)
Don't give me food then tell me
not to ask for it next time!
Pick up your clothes
(The laundry basket is right there!)
Get rid of that vacuum cleaner
(It's evil, I tell you, e-vil!)
Do your business in the yard
and not in my water bowl! |
